Monday, January 24, 2011

I forgot I was a human

So I thought I was going to get this posted earlier, but I obviously didn't, so now I am. Better late than never, right? This one is more personal than the others have been thus far. I said that I wasn't planning on posting personal things here, but I didn't really have a plan for this blog other than my thoughts. This blog is really an experiment for me and I don't know where its going to go or what it "should" look like until I try it out. 

Last week I was thinking about how I was constantly being reminded that I was in fact a human and nothing more. You see, I sometimes have a tendency to get lost in my own world and think that I am so completely awesome, but then I go out into the real world and reality comes crashing in and I realize that there are big limitations on what I can do. 






I wish I would have written this sooner because then I could have given you some better examples of what I am talking about, but alas, I did not. However, one thing that I think should constantly serve as a reminder that we are all nothing more than humans is that we need to sleep every night. I think of sleep sometimes as one of God's control mechanism for humans to ensure that we don't get too out of control and start building Towers of Babel. Could you imagine humans not needing sleep like we do?

Spiritual Application

Most of you know my beliefs, but I figured I would title this section and let you know that this is the part of the post where I go more spiritual. So if you want to turn back now is the time.

I was thinking this last week about how performance oriented I am when it comes to my faith and how despite my best efforts I can't be perfect. Now the fact that I even am this way is amazing in itself given how much how the Bible says that no one can do it; but for some reason I think I can because I think I'm better than everyone else (I'm working on the whole thinking I'm better than everyone thing).

As I write this I think one of the hardest things for me to understand is why God would choose to show so much love to beings that are so incapable of keeping His standards. Then again I haven't done the whole love thing much in my life (not by choice mind you; thats just kind of how my life has worked out thus far), so maybe that's part of the problem also.

The whole love thing is another topic for me though. Perhaps in the next post I'll go there.

5 comments:

  1. I think you raise two important issues. First, that none of us can be perfect going forward and thus certainly cannot make ourselves pure again from past mistakes, with the implication that none of us can earn our acceptance by God [who is perfect and pure and holds that as the absolute standard]. That is why we need his grace, which he gives us unconditionally [i.e. we don't earn it]. As you implied, it is a wondrous and marvelous thing that God loves us even as we are!

    A second point that you mentioned and then veered away from is viewing faith as performance oriented. Faith is a relationship with God, a relationship that involves getting to know him and understanding him through his revealed scriptures and the Holy Spirit's indwelling, spending time with him [in prayer, worship, and silent solitude, e.g.], and allowing him to transform you through the renewing of your mind. Sanctification [or "spiritual growth"] is the change in who you ARE. Changing what you DO [improving your obedience] is an effect of that inner transformation.

    So I seek to grow continuously in my relationship with God and in walking with him in obedience, but I don't seek to measure my spirituality by a perfectionistic performance standard. Let us rejoice in his grace and appreciate the salvation and spiritual growth we have experienced, and the intimacy we now enjoy with him.

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  2. Your statement "...I haven't done the whole love thing much in my life..." I take it you are referring to male/female love. While that is the love relationship that is most apparent to us, there are so many love relationships we can have outside of the male/female love. Love is a choice, not always a feeling...God has chosen to love us even when sometimes he probably feels like kickin' us in the pants. We choose to love others because it is the Godly things to do.

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  3. I changed the comment text so that you can actually read it now.

    Will - I think you nailed my problem with "I don't seek to measure my spirituality by a perfectionistic standard." As I think about it I think that might be part of the issue for me; measuring my spirituality by a perfectionistic standard. I need to get better at the whole accepting grace thing I think.

    Mom - I am not just referring to a romantic type of love, but love in general. As you yourself know even friendships have been hard for me to come by. The point is that there is a lot that I don't understand about love and me not experiencing it a lot in my life, whether in friendships or romance, is a contributing factor to my not understanding it.

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  4. In Cloud and Townsend's "How People Grow," they said that one reason we need intimate relationships within the church is because we cannot fully understand concepts like God's love, grace, forgiveness, and acceptance, until we experience them from the body of Christ. So you have a point there.

    But you have experienced these things, Tom, even if not in the context of peer relationships. I know of several adults who invested in you when you were a youth, and who continue to invest in you now, and extend these things to you; maybe you are too introspective and not observant enough of what God has brought you outside yourself? I have had to find that balance too...

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  5. Probably. I know we discussed the whole people loving me but me not believing them thing before. The issue isn't that people don't show me love, grace, acceptance, etc, but that for some reason I end up not believing them.

    It's been quite some time since we talked about that though, and since that time things have certainly improved for me in the peer relationship area.

    The comment in the post though was meant more as an observation about my life rather than as a comment regarding the current state of my life.

    Not that I mind you bringing this up, but just wanted to clarify it for anyone else who might read this and wonder about it.

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